Interview With An ASSHOLE

Ok this is my second time being tagged in the same week. This time I have tagged by the Damn Humbl Devil. He had an interview format and I was supposed to tag people, but I'm not... Why? Cause it has to stop sometime. And I didn't like all the questions so I made up my own F***ing Interview. Do enjoy!!!

Why am I an Asshole?
I am an Asshole, because I speak my mind with very few filters. My sarcastic humor is the truth in the form of a sword.

What pisses me OFF?
The mentally weak people that complain about life and have no plans of doing anything different aka Insanity~ doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.

If I president for a Day?
If I was president for the day I would stop the politically correct marketing that we do with the general public. We are going to war to secure our financial interest in the oil fields. We did that in Desert Storm the first time and everyone was ok with it. When asked about torturing prisoners I would say hell yeah we tortured them we also will assassionate people in power if we have too. When they attack us we call it terrorism and when we send navy seals, cia and nsa to do the same we call it protecting our way of life. People are in place to do the dirty work so that you can watch American Idol with out bombs interrupting.

WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
I really want to retire this year.

COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?
Cuban coffee is the strongest and XS energy drink is my favorite because it taste good. Sometimes I have both.
IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
This is only XXX rated thoughts of what I want to eat... LOL

WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
Flowers, poems, deep looks through ones eyes or some dick and bubble gum...Depending on my mood

BLONDES, BRUNETTES, BLACK or BROWN?
I'm a fan of darker hair, but I also like highlights. And who made the rule that you can only have one date at a time? So give me one of both.

WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
Besides my ASS... My tongue It cums with a orgasm gaurantee. I have almost sufficated because of my tongue.

IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Hell...yeah... Whats not to like about me? Nevermind this gun to your head LOL

DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
Yes, I believe that everyone wants to do good and until they prove otherwise I trust them.

SIBLINGS?
Oldest of 4 Assholes

ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
No, but most of the time women ask me out.

THINK and Grow RICH or Stay Poor

The below article is in response to discussions I have had on Ced's Blog and his frequent reader Dave. The discussion was in reference to wealth, poverty, race and class. My stand point has been that your position in life change be changed by simply changing your thoughts. The article is written for wealth vs poverty but wealth and poverty is more than just money its health, relationships and over all way of life.

Join me as I explain the Law of Attraction. Below is a you tube link of successful people speaking on the same subject.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_b1GKGWJbE8&mode=related&search=

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“Emotions provoke your thinking; your thoughts will determine your actions; your actions determine your results.”
- Andrew The Asshole

Wealth and Poverty are both REALATIVE term that exists among all races. Poverty can be broken into two categories: Generational – 2 or more generations and Situational – sudden death, divorce, etc.

Wealth and POVERTY can be traced back to one’s thoughts. Considering we generally learn how to think by the environment we grow up in; so it is true that the RICH get RICHer and the POOR get POORer. Whatever tax bracket you are raised in the chances of you do drastically better are highly Unlikely.

INSANITY: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
“The measure of success is not whether you have a tough problem to deal with, but whether it’s the same problem you had last year.” - John Foster Dulles

Growing up my parents would always tell me that birds of a feather FLOCK together. As adults sometimes we forget that this rule still APPLIES. Take the time to think of your 5 closest friends and your income will be on average within 5% of each other.

If my parents or guardians were POOR; then go to college were 90% of professors are POOR; then I hang out with my neighbors or co-workers who are POOR… Chances are I’m going to be POOR too.

I believe that people can have and accomplish anything they want… But a wise man once me that, “Blowing smoke in your own face will only make you cough.” You can have anything you want, but you aren’t going to get it with you CURRENT thought process. If you could get there with your current THOUGHT process then you would ALREADY be there. If you don’t like were you are in life you can probably trace it back to your thoughts. This change will take time and might even be painful but “Pain is weakness leaving the body.”

BELOW is a chart from Paine’s book “A Frame work for POVERTY.” The chart describes the different thoughts of the different classes to the same situation. BELOW is a list of though-processes from Paine's book “A Framework for POVERTY.” The following describes the different thoughts of the different classes to the same situations. (P) - Poor; (M) - Middle Class; (W) - Wealthy.

Possessions
P: People
M: Things
W: One of a kind Objects, Legacy, Pedigree

Money
P: Used to be spent
M: Managed
W: Conserve, Invest

Personality
P: Entertainment, Sense of Humor
M: Stability, Achievement highly Valued
W: Connections: Social, Political, Financial

Social Emphasis
P: Social Inclusion he or she likes
M: Self-Governing, Self Sufficiency
W: Social Exclusion

Food
P: Quantity, Do you have enough?
M: Quality, Was it good?
W: Presentation

Clothing
P: Individual Style, Personality
M: Quality, Labels, Acceptance into the middle class
W: Designer, Artistic sense, Expression

Time
P: Present Thinking Only
M: Future
W: Traditions, History

Education
P: Not Really Important
M: Crucial for the climbing the ladder of success
W: Necessary tradition for making connections

Destiny
P: Fate
M: Choice, Can change the future with good choices
W: Nobleness Oblige

Language
P: Casual, Survival
M: Formal, Used to negotiate
W: Formal for Networking

Family Structure
P: Matriarchal, Women are the head of the house
M: Patriarchal, Father is head of the house
W: Whoever has the most money

Love & Acceptances
P: Conditional, Based on whether the individual likes them or not
M: Conditional, Based on Achievements
W: Conditional, Related to social standing

World Views
P: Local
M: National
W: International

Driving Forces
P: Survival, Entertainment, Relationships
M: Work, Achievements
W: Connections: Social, Political, Financial

Humor
P: People or Sexual
M: Situational
W: Social Faux Tas
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Can wealth be obtained by simply changing your way of thinking?

The "ASS" Poem

Girly Girl is one of my latest Noteworthy Asshole bloggers bookmarked and a Noteworthy MILF too :D. Her site is filled with great poetry. Her last poem "Election" all of the lines ended in "ion." She informed me that this is an example a sonic repetition. I requested a sonic reputition of another kind, so upon my request she wrote this "ASS" of a Poem.

Hi, Andrew! Here is your 'ASS' Poem

"Andrew, what an ass
without being crass
sharp--shards of glass
he does not harass
forgives my trespass
riotous, a gas
his words have mass
People, fill your wineglass
this blog--don't pass
Andrew is endearing to this lass"


I'm INSPIRING Poems here People!!!!! Cheers to all my adoring ass fans!!! I Love you ALL!

The Asshole Next Door

I couldn't resist this tag from Confessions7girl, she always stops by and shows me some Asshole Love!! Plus its a great way for you to get to know the asshole next door in Blogsville.
Rules are:
* Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
* People who are tagged need to write posts in their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
* At the end of your post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
1. I'm really not an ASSHOLE just intellectually brash.
2. Ambition is an a major turn on for me with women.
3. I only hang with people that are going places in life.
4. My friends have asked me if I would consider running for president one day.
5. I tend to date older women.
6. Women usually approach me.
7. My next car is going to be the Jag XKR convertible
8. Give a man a fish he will eat today, Teach a man to fish and he will eat for the rest of his life, Help the man buy the pond and generations to come will eat forever.







Assholes I have taged
* Jewels Ray
* Brandon
* Girly Girl
* Starry Nights
* Rejeev
*Ced.it/Mean.it
*Dreamer Catcher
*DC Speaks
*Crashtest Comic

I Demand A Recount!!!!

Last Month People Magazine put out an issue of the most beautiful celebrities and some how Drew Barrymore is the winner. Who the hell was on this commitee? She's not ugly, but she sure is not the prettiest celebrity. Maybe she has a nice personality?

Below are pictures of a few celebrities that should have beat drew barrymore out for this top spot. But who should have graced the cover of People's Magazine most beautiful people issue? Ladies I didn't forget you I put some pics there for you to, please join us in this voting process. It might not change the cover but they will be the Most Beautiful ASS!!!!

*********They do not have to be pictured below*************

There's a Market for NIGGAS

My latest bookmarked blog is ced.it/mean.it he posted the above video, which i had to show him some love like only an asshole like myself could.

There is a push to clean up hip hop music after IMUS's "nappy-headed" comments. Is this really a black hip hop issue? You can find a negative stereotype of all most any race protrayed in some form of media.

The Italian Mafia, South American Drug Lords, African Blood Diamonds, The Middle East Bombers, etc

If you clean up one well, hell should we just get rid of the 1st ammendment all together? Next we will be having a police society like in the movie V for Vendetta.

Is this a real problem and we need to censor everything, or is this just a reaction to recent events that will soon be forgotten?

Women.... As Easy As 1, 2, 3

Ladies and Gentlemen gather around…Like BIGGIE I’ve got a story…A story we will call SEDUCTION. I’m sure the title has women mad at me…BUT now that I have you undivided ATTENTION… WOMEN if you apply these principles you too can have any MAN you want.

*Sex appeal is 50% what you have got and 50% is what people think you got. ~ Sophia Loren*

The practical application of this quote is what I would like to call the art of seduction. This applies to both men and women, The Art of Seduction will give you the ability have pratically anyone that you choose.

***Disclaimer - I am not responsible for the influx of men or women you will attract due to this story****

FIRST Lesson… this dance is not your classic romance movie it’s WAR, and this beautiful lady is a castle that has to be sieged as carefully as any army general. Every step has to be planned and executed with the utmost attention to detail and nuance.

First ACTION… approach the women with a bit of distance and air of nonchalance. Next time together confide in her as would a friend not a potential lover. THIS will throw her off the scent.

SECOND Lesson… Once the woman is confused make her jealous.

Second ACTION…At the next major function showed up with a beautiful lady. Beautiful women usually have equally beautiful friends. Wherever you are seen, be surrounded by BEAUTIFUL women. The young lady will not just be seething with jealously but will see you are someone others desire. This gives you instant value and will make it that much more satisfying to snatch you from their clutches.

THIRD Lesson…Once jealous next MESMERIZES her.

Third ACTION… Began to fail to show up at affairs where she is expected to see you. Then, suddenly, appear at places you have never frequented before, but she will be in attendance. This pushed the HER to a state of emotional CONFUSION that is a prerequisite for successful seduction.

She will begin to laugh harder at your jokes and listen to your stories more closely. She began to ask others questions about you. THESE moves will take several weeks or even months, but the CASTLE walls will fall.

At some point during this SEDUCTION, you may be tempted but do NOT give into frivolous impulses to tell her that you LOVE her. This will ONLY break the spell. Wherever this encounter leads, she loves the ADVENTURE. If you play it long enough where you lead her will NOT matter.

FOLLOW these steps and the ART of SEDUCTION… EASY as 1, 2, 3.

Its Not My Responsibility

We try so hard to create our own little world that we are safe in because we fill in control

Because we have great certainity that we are not in control

Tragic events of 9/11 caused an increase in security in airports. More recently the killing spree at Virgina Tech is raising concerns of security on campuses around the world. Society wants the government to regulate and take responsiblity for these type of events. These security issues will ultimately lead to a society of microchipped people (i-robots) Companies are now selling this as a service to keep track of your kids and animals. This is simply marketing to make it normal to have it.

Riddle Me This Riddle Me That

I had a female friend send me the following text message:

“I was dying and I sent you to the store with $1. What would you bring me back?”

My Response:

“I would take the dollar put gas in my car…drive to the nearest drug store…steal a box of flavored condoms in assorted colors.”

She said that this was not the right answer but I figured a few orgasms would revive her.

What’s the right answer to this Riddle????

I was suppose to go to the store and get her some lifesavers